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jokes of the day:
Blondes and Grenades:
Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a Grenade at you?

A: You pull the pin out and throw it back at her.

---

Whorehouse in Anchorage:
A Texan walked into a whorehouse in Anchorage and asked, "Do you have a girl here from Texas named Arlene?" "Sure do," said the madam. "Go on up to Room 6."

The Texan went up to Room 6 and knocked on the door. When the woman answered it, he asked "Are you Arlene from Texas?"

"I sure am," she replied.

"Well, I got two hundred dollars," he proudly said.

The hooker grabbed him by the shirt and dragged him into the room. After they had thrashed around on the mattress for a half an hour, the Texan got up to leave. "Will you be here tomorrow?" he asked.

"Sure," Arlene said, "I'll be here."

The next night, the Texan came back and went up to Room 6. Another two hundred dollars, another hour of horizontal aerobics. When they were done, the Texan was sitting on the side of the bed and he asked, "Will you be here tomorrow night?"

"Honey," she said, "I'll be here every night for you."

The next night, the Texan came back again. Same thing: two hundred dollars, the best sex of his life. When they were done, they were both sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Say," Arlene said, "what part of Texas you from?"

"I'm from Dallas," the Texan says, with a big grin.

"Well, I got a sister in Dallas!" the hooker cries.

"I know it," the Texan says, "and she gave me six hundred dollars to give to you!"

---

Suitable punishment:
Three guys were on a trip to Saudi Arabia.

One day, they stumbled into a harem tent filled with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the Sheik came in.

"I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done today. You will be punished in a way corresponding to your profession."

The sheik turns to the first man and asks him what he does for a living. "I'm a cop", says the first man. "Then we will shoot your penis off!", said the sheik.

He then turned to the second man and asked him what he did for a living. "I'm a firemen", said the second man. "Then we will burn your penis off!", said the sheik.

Finally, he asked the last man, "And you, what do you do for a living?" And the third man answered, with a sly grin, "I'm a lollipop salesman!"

---














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